For those of you who don't know me or who have never been to my apartment because your cat allergy is so severe you would scratch your eyes out (you know who you are), let me introduce you to CJ and Razzle. They get along really well. Razzle is the obese tabby and the bane of my existence. CJ is the crippled orange tabby and the bane of my existence.
If you think I am exaggerating, let me give you some examples of how my life may be different than some of yours solely because I own cats.
I have to tape down the switch to my garbage disposal.
That's right. Last year I was sitting in my living room when I was startled by the sound of my garbage disposal going off. It took me a second to figure out what the sound was, then another couple of seconds to realize how it came on. It's a good thing three seconds wasn't long enough to burn up the motor or for Idiot Orange to lose a tail.
I can't leave anything on any surface in my apartment lower than 6 feet. Period.
I mean, I could, but doing so puts said object in risk of being pushed off and broken, laid on, scratched, licked, eaten... or all of the above. I've lost term papers and irreplaceable Slovak crystal this way, along with a myriad of meals and drinks.
I can't stay in bed past 7:00 am. Ever.
I have a feline alarm clock. This might come as a shock to you, but Razzle doesn't miss a meal. She gets fed twice a day, usually around 7 am and 7 pm. If it's too much later than 7 am and Razzle doesn't have food in her bowl, she will not stop meowing until I get up. And I understand- she's a lot like her momma in that sense. The difference is, given the option, most times momma would prefer to sleep off that hangover rather than eat breakfast.
Basically, I live with two toddlers that will never go up.
Even with these the annoyances, I obviously love my kitties. I would probably rescue every stray cat I saw if I could. But I've had a total of 7 hours sleep this weekend (more on that later), and if I have to tell them to stop fighting one more time...
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